The love was thick in the room as we gathered around in a tight huddle. Tears were streaming, heads resting on shoulders, all eyes on our special kitty in the center.

It was time to say goodbye to a cat who had been a part of our lives for 16 years.

Chailynne came into the picture to earn her keep as a mouse hunter. The empty plot of land behind our home had been purchased by a developer who immediately began construction. The project ended up falling through, but the damage had been done. Gophers had burrowed tunnels throughout our backyard and dozens of mice had moved indoors.

I was 11 years old when the landline rang. Dad had picked up a cat from the humane society. And not just any cat; he picked the grumpiest and feistiest one back in the “to be euthanized” section. He and the cat were on their way!

One or possibly two eternities later, my dad finally arrived with a white, small, house shaped box. Sort of like the cardboard boxes that carried home our Build A Bear stuffed toys. Upon opening the box, to our surprise, a very small and very black cat huddled in the corner, clearly terrified.

We children were DELIGHTED.

The cat was NOT DELIGHTED.

This incident alone told the cat everything she knew about her new companions. Without a second glance at us crotch goblins, Chay chose Mom as her closest and truest friend. Mom felt the same. :]

While Chaylynne turned out to not be a great mouse hunter, she did make a great lap cat companion. The years went on and we were all obsessed with our 5 lb kitty

She survived 3 moves with our family:

She was definitely grumpy and ill tempered with children. But that didn’t stop the obsessive cuddles we had ready at any given moment.

Her health was decidedly failing as the days led into June 2021. She was 20 or 21 years old at this point. Spite had fueled the longevity of her lifetime. First, I had had the audacity to make my own children just as original children were finally turning into adults. Then, my sisters all brought home kittens of their own. The fury of our decisions gave Chaylynne at least another 4 years of life. But now… now it was time to go home where she could finally be at peace.

We all took turns holding her in her favorite yellow blanket and telling her how much we loved her. (We took pictures but they feel too personal to share online.) Too soon it was time to go to the vet to peacefully aide her journey out of this life.

The ride home was quiet.

I felt like a kid again; Dad at the wheel and Mom in the passenger seat. Cami & Kylee riding next to me. No music on the radio. Each person lost in their own thoughts. I think Mom was holding Chaylynne in her little casket in her lap.

The clinic offered us a mold of her paw print, but they were SO expensive. (Like, $50 for a single plastered print.) We decided to make our own with modeling clay from Walmart. Everyone in the family got their own ornament of our beloved kitty’s paw print.

It’s kind of weird to say, but my favorite memory from that day was eating dessert with my family. Kaye and Maddie joined us at the house for angel food cake with strawberry topping and reddi-whip. That little dessert is the same one that my mom made for us kids the first time our family pet died (a Russian Dwarf hamster named Sugar).

I don’t think I’ll ever forget sitting together at the table that night… the same one we had as kids, actually. Laughing at stories and taking turns crying on each other’s shoulders. Eating cake that tastes like sadness and comfort. Chaylynne’s paw prints drying on the book shelf behind us.

It was a certainly a beauty for ashes moment. I only wish that Chay was there to lick the whipped cream off our fingers.

Miss you little cat. I hope we get to see you again ❤