This semester is finally almost over though not in a way that feels relieving.

This past Tuesday morning, at an hour where people aren’t even alive or breathing, I resurrected myself from the actual dead to take the national field exam of business with my graduating class. It was a super fun time testing on all aspect of business, especially the business statistics portions, because I haven’t taken that class yet. (:

I have a presentation in 20 minutes. One that I completely forgot to put together until late last night. I stayed up until the hours when demons are summoned in order to finish it. Fortunately, the presentation looks nice. Coherent, even. ‘Course, that could be the demons talking because I’m functioning on less than 8 hours of sleep which is CRISIS MODE when you’re no longer 18 years old.

The home in general is in a raging panic. The boys are quietly playing by themselves, which is high key SUSPICIOUS. Last night’s groceries are still strewn over the counter. The cat’s litter box needs a change, which is triple stress, because if it’s not cleaned daily, he will SULK and then GIVE himself a kidney infection, and then pee all over my clothing. Just mine.

A batch of orange rolls made especially for my kids accidentally sat out overnight and the kids were/are upset that I didn’t give them the rolls for breakfast like promised because the glaze still hasn’t been made but the glaze can’t be made until the counter is cleared which is impossible, of course, because GROCERIES, and the groceries remind me that last night I gave a teenage kid a ride home from the store and I’m not entirely sure I took him to the right house (he has an intellectual disability), and as we unloaded his bike from my trunk, he let me know that the black rubber bits between the car & the car door had completely ripped off my trunk and now I can’t get the door to close, which I hope can be fixed with special car glue because our budget has been DECIMATED because COVID RUDELY TRIED TO KILL MY HUSBAND and while it was ultimately unsuccessful, it did take 2 weeks worth out of his paycheck, which for those of you who are good at math, is HALF A MONTH’S INCOME. It might even be more once I learn how to count numbers in my math classes next semester.

STRESSFUL.

Anyway, I’m going to put on Jake & the Neverland Pirates for the boys, throw the cat out to fend for his own bladder in the Great Utah Mini Blizzard of 2021, and then anxiously twist my wedding ring until my professor pops on my camera and I can word vomit the marketing presentation onto him & the clients.

Then I will complete a paper & a quiz.

And then I will fade into the snowy trees like an evil ghost whose traumatic past has finally been discovered.

UNFUN FACT: Last year, I showed up to my zoom presentation half dressed. This is that same professor. COLLEGE IS SO FUN.